How Sexual Anxiety Can Seriously Affect Your Sex Life And 3 Ways To Overcome It

You know that feeling, where a certain kind of heaviness builds up in your chest and makes you feel like something is sinking? When an overwhelming sense of unease takes over your body and you can't get rid of it, no matter how hard you try? When do you feel scared and even something as natural as breathing starts to work? That is what is called anxiety. And when we feel it in bed just before sex, it's called sexual anxiety.

What is sexual anxiety?

A common phenomenon that occurs in both men and women, sexual anxiety is associated with feelings of fear, doubt, shame, and self-awareness during intercourse. It is also called 'execution anxiety', and one of the main reasons for its appearance is the feeling of lack of confidence and self-criticism of the person during the "execution", considering it an act that can be judged. This feeling of insecurity can stem from anything, a previous bad experience where you felt humiliated, fearful of being criticized, confused about your sexuality, or simply from feeling ashamed of your own body. In fact, the feeling is often dismissed simply as "tension," which ends up underestimating the seriousness of the whole situation.

How it affects you?

In the words of Claudia Six, a sex therapist, sexual anxiety can make arousal and orgasm difficult. She says, 'In men, we know what it is: difficulty getting an erection, maintaining an erection, or getting it too soon. I put it all under the term 'sexual performance anxiety.'

3 Ways to overcome sexual anxiety

Like anxiety, which ends up limiting us to enjoying anything, sexual anxiety also feels like an impediment to having a good time. Rather than controlling the emotion, hoping it will just go away, because that's what men are taught to do with everything, it's always better to treat and nurture it, in a way that it lasts. These are 3 ways to help you overcome sexual performance anxiety in bed:

1. Try mindfulness

Being aware does not mean being more aware of yourself or more aware of yourself, but being present in the moment and trying to live it to the fullest, without letting your thoughts drift elsewhere. Practicing mindfulness will help you understand what is happening in the present moment without worrying about other factors. It's about being in the moment instead of thinking in your head.

2. Take it easy

If you are feeling overwhelmed by sex, it is best to intervene slowly and with a sense of love and care. In fact, it is often recommended to rely on foreplay, which will give you plenty of time to get comfortable, get into the zone, and then proceed to penetrative sex. Feelings of impulsivity often instill tension and a feeling of pressure, a feeling that can be relieved by taking things gently and slowly.

3. Talk about it

Feeling sexual anxiety once or twice can be just a tension, but when you feel like a lot is starting to happen, it's best to talk to your partner and talk about it. This anxiety stems primarily from feelings of inferiority and self-doubt, and talking to your partner about why you feel this way can help ease your mind. Simply broaching the subject with them and realizing that they are not here to judge may be all you need to get over the feeling.